OK so 2nd date with the French guy. We went for lunch, he was nice enough. I was starting to like him but I could see he obviously only wanted sex. I could remember flashbacks of this happening to me last summer, but I allowed my horniness to get the better of me.
We had enjoyed a lot of sexy chats online and texts, so in person he was flirting like mad. Being a single gal is just frustrating sometimes, eventually I thought fuck it and I agreed to go back to his house.
He was a big talker and I expected amazing sex. It was OK at most. Afterwards I felt really dirty and slutty because I am used to being in a long term relationship. Dating is so confusing. I shouldn't have given in like that again, but at the time it is like my logical sense switches off. I used him as much as he used me. I didn't even stay after, I left pretty much straight away. I didn't ask him to call me or whatever, it seems like that would be fake intimacy.
I have still been thinking about him but I know he is not gonna contact me again. It is kind of sad in a way. I really don't wanna do this again cause in my mind I want love and not just sex.
It's hard for a girl to do casual sex, well for me anyway. I seem to get too attached, and feel like I have no self-worth after. I read lots of dating guides online, rules and rituals. Does anyone remember them or know what they are? It seems if you feel a certain way, you should act the opposite?
Like if you like him, you should act like you don't - give them distance, that is what keeps them interested!
Whatever, I am done searching for now.
Gonna focus on my new job and keep my legs firmly CROSSED!
skyla777
thanks for the post - 1st time any1 has ever commented on my blog lolol. i'm new to blogging, its a good outlet. i didn't know anyone reads it he he.
hey hun! totally been there...dont envy you at all! i do however have a reccomendation read for you if you can get hold of it now adays...its by my cousin kate taylor...you may know her from 'sex tips for girls' on t.v? she wrote a book called 'not tonight mr. right' which is all about doing the exact opposite of everything you feel!!!!!!!! i read it, then landed me a husband!!!!! may work!
other than that...dont feel slutty or dirty...he wont be. just congratulate yourself at getting rid of another waste of time relationship that you just happened to get some love making out of at the time! process of elimination my dear watson!
you gotta kiss alot of frogs before you find your prince! dont give up or judge yourself, just do what you gotta do and keep it in the moment! that stuff happened because it felt right at the time, so dont chastise yourself now....you have just learnt another lesson is all.
p.s and dont hate being single....its a liberating time! if you take it for granted, you wont enjoy this freedom! although i love being in a relationship, you do get tied down. use this time to explore yourself and what you want to achieve in life before you settle down. see it as a positive thing. better to be alone than with someone for the sake of it xxx